Beauty according to a teenage girl

As a kid, I always tried to be different from everyone else. I couldn’t be too girly. I didn’t like dolls, makeup, or dressing up. But one thing in particular that I remember was that I was overly confident in the way I looked, which is kind of ironic considering I’m the opposite now.

I would always talk about how much I loved myself and that I didn’t care about how other people thought I looked. When you try so hard to be different from all of the other girls, you start to realize that they always talk about how they aren’t good enough. Well why is that? Nobody is the same. So why is there a specific way people expect each other to look when nobody is the same?

It’s simple. Humans are greedy animals. The beauty industry makes billions of dollars off of the insecurities of people all over the country. Of every shape and size and color and background. All buying the same products to make each other the same because despite how different we all are from each other, one thing brings us together, the hate we have for ourselves and the desire to fit in.

Calm down, calm down. I know that makeup isn’t absolutely horrible. Should we cancel makeup? No. Should we stop wearing makeup? No. We just need to realize when things go too far.

The beauty standard never comes out and tells you that it’s the beauty standard. If you ask most people, they probably think the feminine standard is to be slim and blonde, like Barbie. Yeah, maybe when Marilyn was still alive. The standard now, from the pop culture research I’ve done, is to look like you’ve had pricy($2,000 to $12,000) plastic surgery. Slim waist, curvy body, which is pretty dangerous to be honest. There aren’t really a lot of people who are naturally born that way. It’s kind of hard to lose or gain weight that only affects the parts of your body that you want it to affect. That’s a lot of pressure on a person. The people who were born that way are probably having a great time considering they were likely bullied for their looks when they were younger because it didn’t fit the previous standard.

Social media is also a bad influence on self esteem and the beauty standard. Just think about apps like Snapchat where they make money off of filters that alter the sizes of your facial features to make you look “beautiful.” It's unnatural and since most teens have the app, it teaches them that they will look better if their faces are altered to the standard. Not to mention how essential social media has gotten for teenagers that they feel that they need to do certain things for attention. According to The University of Melbourne's website, studies show that when notifications pop up that a post has been liked by someone “the brain will instinctively produce a surge of dopamine,” AKA the happy chemical. Attention isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it’s the type of attention and the way it’s gotten, that’s the bad thing. Teens feel like they need to be sexualized because that is what gets them the most attention. That is not the case! Everyone can still get the right attention by being truly and wonderfully themselves.

I think dealing with low self esteem is kind of like when people say, “Don't worry, the spider is more afraid of you than you’re afraid of it.” It doesn’t make you feel better, you’re still scared, and so is the spider. If you’re afraid of something it’s really hard to just stop being afraid. That goes with low self esteem. If you’re comparing yourself to someone you can’t just stop. Even if that person doesn’t think that they’re beautiful, you do. Even if that spider doesn’t think it’s scary, you do. Someone out there sees you as beautiful when you don’t. You won’t learn to love yourself overnight and that’s okay. It will take some time. Just remember, beauty standards don’t define who you are, you were made to change the world as yourself.